It has been reported that singer Rihanna and Chris Brown have been involved in an abusive relationship. The whole world found out about the abuse a few months ago after Chris beat her up badly. She did her first interview a couple of weeks ago (see Rihanna Interview) where she talked about it. I was in an abusive relationship before my marriage, so I could relate to a lot of what she was saying. There are also some correlations between abusive relationships and cheating spouse’s.
Four things she said in the interview really struck me.
1. Rihanna stated, “I wanted to help him out.” As women, we are always thinking about how our men feel and wanting to help them. This is what makes us stay in bad relationships.
2. Rihanna also said, “I just wanted it to go away.” We try to sometimes ignore or just not think about any major problems we’re having—such as abuse or an affair—in hopes that it will just stop or somehow fix itself. Because of this, we often just forgive our husbands and put what they did out of our mind, when in reality we are just ignoring what will eventually come to the surface.
3. Rhianna said to look at your relationship from an outsider’s point of view. This is really good advice! She said that if you look at a relationship from the outside, you would think, “Man, what am I doing?” The same applies sometimes to women after they find out their man is cheating.
4. Love is blind. Oh, yes it is! There are situations I never thought I would stay in that I did. There are things I thought I would never do for a man, but I did them. If you have been there too, don’t beat yourself up over it; we all go through it.
I hope women who have found out their husband is cheating and women who are in abusive relationships watch the interview. It is always good to hear a story of a woman surviving these types of experiences.