I want to wish every a Happy New Year!
Progress is an important part of recovery from any trauma or pain. For those of you who have been dealing with a cheating husband for over a year now, how have you progressed? What is something that has gotten better for you since January of last year?
As you answer this question, do not feel bad if you thought you would be in a different place. The important thing is that you are taking steps to be in a better state, even if they are baby steps. It can be hard to see how far you have come in a storm like this, but remember to celebrate any accomplishments you’ve had. For example, you can be proud of yourself if you’ve had fewer triggers relating to the affair than you did the year before. Maybe you and your husband have had several conversations that led to a better understanding of each other. Maybe you just did not let your husband’s actions get to you.
Even if you decided to leave the marriage, as I have done, there can be a lot to celebrate, especially as this move, like everything in your life, is part of your personal journey. Maybe you can celebrate that you and your husband do not argue in front of your kids. Maybe you can celebrate your strength to file for divorce, or that you made the decision to leave.
Remember, every accomplishment is important. In my case, I have created a solid support system now that I live on my own with the kids. I had to go from being totally dependent on my husband for everything to slowly but surely building a support system for myself, since I do not have family that lives close by. I have a handyman to call if the tub stops up and three people who can watch the kids if I need some help. I have also been blessed to have some very important friends come into my life who have really made an impact on how I value myself. I can celebrate progress, even with knowing I have a long road ahead.
How have you progressed in your personal recovery from the affair? I look forward to hearing your answers!