An Affair With Myself – Yum!!

So this weekend I feel like treating myself. As women, life is usually all about everyone but us. We work, we cook, we clean, and we give love to everyone who needs it but ourselves. Please don’t fall into that trap, ladies. Take some time out this weekend to do something that makes you happy. Force yourself to forget about the fact that your husband has cheated. Throw it away, just for a day or even for a couple of hours, and do something good for you. Read a favorite book, get a babysitter and go for a walk, or eat a favorite meal—even it is alone. You are great, and you owe it to yourself to treat yourself great.

Sometimes we need permission to do things that put a smile on our faces. So if you’re looking for permission, I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO DO SOMETHING FOR YOU! Right now! And when you do something for you, even with all that you have been going through, it makes a difference in the world. It shows everyone you interact with that they also have the same permission.

My “me time” will be for a couple of hours tomorrow when I attend a party with one of my friends. For you, it might be totally different. It doesn’t matter, as long as you do it. You deserve it.

4 thoughts on “An Affair With Myself – Yum!!”

  1. Its been three weeks now since i found out my husband had cheated on me with a one night stand with a woman he was talking to online. we are communicating alot and things seem to be going ok. but i cant seem to get myself out of a deep depression for some reason. i get up and i dont want to do anything, and if i do anything i feel nothing. like im surrounded by darkness. how does one get out of the depression or am i expecting to much to soon?

    1. Hello Karen, welcome to the site. Your feelings right now are very normal, so please don’t beat yourself up. If you are like me, I was so use to ‘fixing things’. If there was a problem, I would read a book, phone a friend, and in a matter of days, it was taken care of, until my husband cheated. There was no friend, no book, nothing that could get me out of the misery that I felt in the weeks following the affair. There are SO many reasons why you feel the way you feel, too much to list here but including you mental shock from finding out your husband had the capacity to cheat, the sadness over the ‘image of marriage’ that you created for you and your husband, the list can go on and on. This situation is not one where you can just bounce back. It is good that you both are communicating that will help. If you have the means to go to therapy (just you) I would recommend it. Your emotions are so deep it is often hard for women to get out of it, and a therapist can help (you and your husband can go as well, but I think in your situation, a one on one therapy can help). Other than that, you take it one day at a time, eventually you will start to heal, everyone has been in the place you have been now, and many have recovered, including myself. Best of luck to you!!

  2. How to Get My Ex-Girlfriend Back?Background:So last year in October I was in a fake relationship just bsacuee me and this girl wanted to try it out. Like we assumed though, it didnt work out and we happily dumped each other and now are friends. However, while dating the other girl, I met her friend (lets call her emily). Me and emily hit it off instantly. We could talk for hours and I knew that once I broke off the fake relationship I would definitely have a thing with Emily. The day after the fake relationship ended, I hung out with Emily and we almost hooked up, but somehow I had the willpower to refuse. Then two weeks later though we started dating and life was great. We were with each other and we were both happy for about the first two weeks. Then the third week came around and I personally was just having a bad week. I was just not in a good mood overall and I could sense things going down hill fast. Then that Sunday she called and broke up with me. Up until this point I was the kid who just stuck with hook ups and nothing serious so I thought I wouldnt feel anything. After she broke up with me and hung up the phone, I was completely in shock. After:So after we broke up, she never left my mind. It wasnt like I was depressed like an emo or anything, she just was always on my mind. I still went to parties, hung out with the bros, and hooked up with other chicks, but everynight I would fall asleep to the thought of her and throughout the day I would envision her too. Present:This past sunday I decided to text her cause I was like f ck it, I got nothing to lose. So we texted for like 2 hrs until we had to go and the over the next couple of days we could talk again. Now I know she doesnt openly admit that she likes me, but I know that somewhere inside of her she still holds feelings for me.She still stares at me the same way, like the stare that penetrates your soul.. yeah the deep intense shit. I just am confused and want some advice on what to do next. I mean movies you would steal her away and tell her how you feel, but cmon.. its high school, no one does that and shed think I was stalker material. I just want her to know that I still like her and that I want to talk about it, but with her openly talking to. So how do I accomplish this and what should be my next move?And sorry for makin this cheesy. Im the last guy that would ever write on here, but i came across it doing homework so I though I have nothing to lose and outside people can provide good info.

  3. Calligaris- Well, you are young and still trying to find your way in this big world. The one thing that I think all young men and women should know about relationships is that HONESTY is the best course of action. You are too young to be in a serious relationship right now- or if you think that is where you are headed- pause now and consider this… you are still forming the foundation of the man that you will someday become. Build that foundation with honesty, kindness, and respect for all the women you come into contact with. If you do that, when the “right” one comes along you will be ready and able to form a relationship with her. I think that teenagers today are too eager to jump into and out of relationships that they truly are not ready for- and sometimes it can be devastating emotionally. Love is a funny thing my young friend. When true love comes your way you will KNOW– trust me. For now, show this girl some true respect. Give her space to sort out her feelings for you- show her that you are a true gentleman- you don’t have to wine and dine her to show her that- be yourself– show her who you truly are. If you choose to continue to persue this relationship- you MUST stop all other pursuits. I mean all– this is where men get into trouble. The bad habits and patterns usually form early- don’t betray her trust by going out or seeing other girls. If you aren’t willing to do that- then just be this girls friend. She obviously pulls at your heartstrings- if you really care about her- you won’t betray her trust in a way that will damage any future possibilities with her. She probably knows what type of guy you are or at least she knows the patterns from your past behavior- women just know these things– I bet she is just waiting to see if you are worthy of her affections. So give her space until you make up your mind on if you are willing to give her the respect she deserves — The fact that you were willing to post here and seek advice from us is a good sign that you really do want to do the right thing. Kudos for that! Your mother would be proud. Women don’t want fancy dinners and gifts– they want a man that is honest to the core- with others and himself, attentive to their needs, and someone that supports them on their journey. If this relationship is to be -it will — just tell her the truth ALWAYS. Good luck with your pursuits and be safe— no more hooking up -just to hook up– your true love will come when it is time. Peace and Blessings

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