Now, I am sure there are instances of this, but typically, when a famous married person is involved in a cheating scandal, very rarely do they stay married (or living in the same house) for very long.  There are relationships all over the world where the husband is caught cheating and the marriage survives, if your famous and have money, statistically, your chances are very slim.

When you have money, things don’t get as ugly because you don’t have to stay in the same house.  With most of us ‘regular folk’, the husband cheats and the next day/week, ect, he is still sleeping at the house.  This causes for tension and drama at times.  I feel like one of the main reasons divorces get messy is because people stay under the same roof until it gets ugly.  On a postitive note, living under the same roof after the affair sometimes gives the both of you a chance to talk and understand each other better.

When you have money, you can pay for some ‘think time’, in which you can go away for a week (with or without your husband) and just think about the situation.  Most of us (without a ton of money) have obligations in which we have to squeeze dealing with this in between kids, work, cleaning the house, ect.  And even if you do have money, kids my limit you in the amount of ‘think time’ you have.

Lastly, when you have money, you can pay for the top therapists to help your individually and as a couple.   I think going to a top specialized therapist can do wonders for you recovery efforts.

I know I probably missed some things here, if you think of some, let me know!

-Jewels

Jewels!

Jewels!!

He recommended counseling.  I told him I wanted my cheating husband to set it up.  He thinks it doesn’t matter.  He said set it up yourself and during the sessions you can get a feel if he is really willing to do what it takes to rebuild trust.  One thing that he said that surprised me was that if he did it again, that my stuff and leave immediately, make him realize that he lost out on the deal.  And trust me, he is going to lose big time.  He told me if it doesn’t work, then I have to work on starting out fresh and giving my children the most comfortable life possible.

Even though I felt better after the call, I still feel like I disappointed him, even thought I did not cheat.  I feel like I disappointed him in the choice of the man I married.  I had this same feeling when I told him I was with an abusive man some years ago. Both times, I was out of state, alone, and there was really nothing they could do.   But I am still glad I had the conversation……Till next time ladies!!

OK.  I must speak on this.  Here are 4 things men must know about…Cheating While Pregnant….

1.  Since you have never been pregnant, let me tell you something, sometimes you feel like shit, not for 1 day or 1 month, but during the pregnancy.  My 1st pregnancy was pretty good.  The second, I was depressed, didn’t even want to leave the house.  At times like these, you really need your husband to be supportive, not go and cheat.

2. It is really selfish to cheat on your wife while she is pregnant. I remember not being able to sleep because my husband was not home and didn’t come home until 3am.  I remember him not answering his phone, and me thinking, what if it was something wrong.  You really feel unloved.

3. Men, don’t believe the TV hype that women are so horny when they are pregnant.  Every women is different.  So telling your wife, come on, you should want to have sex all the time, doesn’t make you feel good.

4.If you wife finds out you cheated while she is pregnant, this is totally devastating.  The women is totally helpless and stuck, and to put your wife in this position while she is carrying your child is cowardly.

So, like I stated before, that excuse that she is ‘different’ while she is pregnant is lame.  Marriage is suppose to be for better or worse, and if you can’t tough it out for 9 months, then why did you get married in the first place?

Ladies – Please, please know that Cheating Spouses are known for cheating when the female is pregnant.  Yes, it is horrible, but unfortunately I read the statistic that it is the most common time that a man cheats…..

Right now me and my cheating spouse (former husband) are living together, for the sake of living together.  There is no sex, and communication is only because of our kids.  I have expressed to him that it is over because of his affair and the fact that I can not get over his behavior, and that is ok for me to feel that way.  Of course he wants to get back, but I still think it is to save face.

The think that surprises me is, we don’t have sex at all anymore, and I love it!!!  There is such anger and resentment towards him, that when he even tries to come toward me in a sexual manner, I want to either throw up or throw something at him.  Our sex life is over.  And the funny thing is, I am less stressed.  I don’t have to think about if he is or isn’t going to come on to me.  I don’t have to stress about feeling bad that I don’t have sex with him anymore.  I don’t have to stress about birth control or pregnancy.  The world is just a little bit simplified by the fact that I refuse and can’t emotionally have sex with him anymore.  Someone (of course a guy) said, don’t do that (meaning now have sex), your going to drive him away.  Oh well, I will not sacrifice my own happiness and emotionally stability to try to please a cheating spouse who has hurt me so much.   I really have to give it to those women who choose and want to stay by their man, that is a very difficult thing to do.   I am unfortunately not in that category.  And I am slowly starting to realize that getting a divorce is much longer and much more of a headache than I ever imagined.   So I better get use to the lack of sex.  Ladies, I would rather not have sex than to have sex and regret it or not feel good afterwords!!  Till next time.

1. ‘I wanted to help him out’ – as women, we are always thinking about how the man feels and helping him out.  That is what makes us stay in bad relationships, wanted to help him out.

2. ‘I just wanted it to go away’ – we try to sometimes ignore or not think about the situation in hopes that it can go away. This is oftentimes when we forgive out husbands by just putting the act out of our mind, when in reality, we are just ignoring what will eventually will come to the surface.

3. Look at it from a 3rd person’s view.  This was good advice that Rihanna gave.  She said that if you look at the relationship from the outside looking in, you would think, man, what am I doing.  The same applies sometimes to women after they find out their man is cheating.

4. Love is blind – YES IT IS.  There are situations that I never thought I would stay in but I did.  There are things I thought I would never do that for a man, but I did.  If you have been there, don’t beat yourself up over it, we all go through it.

I hope women that have found out their husband are cheating and women who are in abusive relationships watch the interview, it is always good to hear a story of a strong women surviving, which is what we are all going to do as well.